Tuesday 2 October 2012

I DO, FOR A BOATLOAD OF CASH


This story has been making headlines around the world, so I’m sure many of you have stumbled across it. But as most things that make headlines, it’s pretty unbelievable (although sadly, at the same time, not so in this day and age). A Hong Kong property and shipping tycoon – which means uber wealthy, we’re talking Warren Buffett money – has offered $65 million dollars to any man (I’m thinking ‘any’ has some strict guidelines, or at least I hope it does) who will wed his daughter. More specifically, his lesbian daughter who recently wed her girlfriend of seven years in France. Ah yes, denial stretches across all socio-economic backgrounds.
So Daddy Warbucks, aka Cecil Chao by birth, put this large bounty out there to the male population as he still considers his daughter single – of course he does – and is simply wanting to help her find a good husband. What a kind, magnanimous parent he is. [Apparently up until 1991, it was illegal to be homosexual in Hong Kong, let alone married. I’m sure marriage between the same sex is grounds for beheading]. The irony in this story is pretty far reaching; for starters Cecil himself has never been married. I’m thinking that should tell you a lot about his views on commitment and his ability to find a suitable partner for anyone really. Furthermore, I simply love how ol’ Cecil is just pretending that not only is his daughter single – even though she’s not – but that she is even in the slightest bit interested in marrying a man. I think the fact that she fled to France to marry her longtime partner gives us that answer in big bold letters.
As the consummate businessman Cecil is purely viewing this as a business proposal (how romantic) for some entrepreneur out there who is incredibly talented, at what I’m not sure, but does not have the capital to start his or her own business. In fact, Mr. Chao says he doesn’t mind what kind of economic background the man comes from, he just wants him to be ‘generous and kind-hearted’...and willing to overlook the fact that his daughter is a lesbian. I added that last part, purely because I’m thinking that’s the most relevant factor in all this. He has also waxed lyrical about several of his daughter’s good points, she's talented, attractive, loves her parents; then again, I’m thinking her most tantamount quality is her ability to overlook her father’s ignorance, but hey that’s me. His daughter, to her great credit, has called her father’s recent money proposal amusing and claims to not be worried…well until an actual suitor steps forward. And then I’m thinking permanent emigration may be on the cards for her and her girlfriend. Mais Oui!
King, I will promise you now, you can love who you want, when you want, where you want – well, as long as you’re of age, not on a park bench somewhere and she is nice to you and adores me. Otherwise, the world is your oyster. Plus, your father and I don’t have 65 million dollars. If we did, we’d simply buy an island and stick you on it until you found a girl we deemed suitable. [I kid, I kid. We’d simply send you to space with Richard Branson to keep you out of trouble]. Ah parents, got to love them.
(Happy Birthday Anne. We love you).


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