Thursday 11 October 2012


I’ve been absent for a while, my blogging apologies. It has been a full plate of late, and I have just gotten back from a memorial. I will perhaps blog about it in the future, but it is one of those experiences that I’m still processing (as any good therapized Californian does) and am enjoying keeping to myself for the moment. 

Anyway, today apparently is 'International Day of the Girl.' It is a day set aside – I'm quoting here, to make sure I get it exactly right - ‘to advocate for girls' rights and raise issues of gender bias.’ Sounds like a very worthy addition to the world's calendar, far surpassing some of the other days that litter the American calendar (Flag day? Seriously, what is that?) and never made much sense to me. Anyway, CNN asked some of the world’s most remarkable and renowned women across a variety of fields what they would say to their 15-year-old selves. Perhaps a bit of advice, tips, suggestions…or a verbal beat down if you will. I mean seriously, where to start?! What wouldn’t I say to my fifteen-year-old self? 

So after much thought (about four minutes) I must admit, I found it hard to narrow it down; one would be that one gem of advice that my fifteen year old self needed to hear, or more importantly, would’ve heard back then - as she would've most likely ignored me. But, why not entertain the dialogue as I'm in control at this very minute.

I think I would’ve said to myself: 'Anthea’…that’s me. 'Anthea, slow down. Take a breath. No, a real breath. Deep, in and out and focus on what I’m saying. Everything you think that is important right now, as you stand here in your unsure, hormone ridden teenager body..well, it’s not that important. Or certainly not as important as you think it is. Okay, some things are important, like education, and building a moral compass...and when you get home at 2am and want a tuna melt, try not to burn the house down. That’s important. But all those other fears, insecurities, worries and ‘must do’s', they’ll all change by the day, week, and month. And nothing is controllable. You hear that, nothing. You'll turn out just fine. Maybe not exactly as you imagined (but who does) but you'll be blessed with a loving family, hot husband and gorgeous kid that you shall deem the King (trust me, he's earned the title).

And regarding those teenage hormones, those mood inducing, rage fuelled, insecurity driving, maddening hormones…well they’ll never disappear, but they’ll lessen overtime. [Welcome to being a woman]. So for now, do your best to channel them. However you can, in whatever way you can, channel all those negative forces into something positive, something constructive, something energy fuelled. Sing. Dance. Jump up and down. Climb a tree. Climb Everest. Climb onto the roof of your car - wait, you don't drive yet. Make that your sister's car, she'll love that. Whatever it takes really, just get off the sofa, stop watching 'The Love Boat' and let out a long, guttural scream. Trust me, you’ll feel better.

The other thing I would remind myself is to appreciate every second. Even those seconds where one has no clue which way to turn, or what to do, think, wear (please lose the red leather jacket with the fringe - MF you remember) or say. Appreciate being young and having all those choices and opportunities; because the years go by fast, and your ass falls with it. Oh, and about your ass..It’s cute. It’s strong; it connects your back to your legs. Stop being an insecure jackass and thinking you have to look like this or that, cause when you’re my age you’ll miss the height of that ass. Trust me.

But most importantly, go find a mentor. Go find someone you respect and trust, and ask them about life, ask them about their regrets, their dreams, and their biggest accomplishments and how they attained them. Ask them if they could do it all again, would they do it any differently? And when they answer, and they will, listen. Really listen. Cause your teenage ears are filled with a lot of wax, seawater, and god knows what else that is preventing you from hearing what is important....and don’t do drugs, drink or drive or skip breakfast. OH, and buy Apple stock (god how I wish I knew such things back then).'

You see King, you’re mother knows a few things. Or at least she does now.

Happy Thursday. 

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