Monday 16 April 2012


Recently a four-year-old English girl joined Mensa. Yes, you heard that right. Apparently she has an IQ of 159, which is just one point below Stephen Hawking and Albert Einstein. Now that is some serious bragging rights at the park, can’t you just hear it now: ‘my child is so gifted, she can do a whole puzzle by herself.”...“That’s so sweet; my four year old can recite the Bill of Rights and Pi backwards and just whipped through a tome on quasars and anti-matter.” Okay then.

To be honest, I’m not sure what I would do if the King were that bright. I love the kid, but as he’s still calling planes, birds, I don’t think I’m going to have to worry about him joining Mensa by next week. Besides, there is something disconcerting about meeting a little kid that whips out six syllable words and starts talking to you about Einstein’s photoelectric effect. I can just manage when I’m asked by a little kid why the sun is hot (and trust me, I still have to look it up on the internet to get my facts straight), let alone anything more advanced that that.

I suppose if you were extremely bright, then it wouldn’t be so intimidating that your child was set to graduate University at eleven years old. Then again, if you weren’t you could always have your kid tutor you and expand your educational base. Forget playing kickball, you have to teach Mommy the basic tenets of physics thank you very much! I think if the King were Mensa I'd put him to good use, you know, have him do our taxes, write legal writs of eviction to scare the neighbors, rewire (I realize this is not the right term for this, but as I don't have a clue if one could even do this, let's just leave it at that) our house so we got free TV, heating and water. You know, the important things in life.

The other thing I suppose that has always freaked me out when it comes to hyper bright children is that they never seem to do ‘kid’ things. I suppose if you’re Mensa it is simply not interesting to go kick a ball or stick cars under the sofa cushions (seriously, the King’s favorite past time). The world must seem extraordinarily beneath you, especially if you have the verve and curiosity of a child coupled with a high IQ. Then again, I suppose for a parent it does relieve some of your worries, i.e. will my child learn to read – this four year old had it sussed at two – will he be bright enough to get into college, will he or she be able to hold down a job. I’m thinking if your kid is Mensa, the only thing you’re worried about is getting them around other children or adults that fall into the same category so they don’t feel so darn different.

And trust me, this is not an easy task. Have you met the fray out there?? Not so bright, I assure you. 

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