Sunday 18 April 2010

COUGAR SHMOUGAR. I'M JUST PRAGMATIC.


My partner is younger than I am. If we were tapping into the zeitgeist I suppose that makes me a cougar, as they have deemed it – cause god knows they need a term for everything these days. So what does that mean exactly?? I’m a bloodthirsty wild animal that hunts down the small and defenseless? I suppose it’s a bit better than the male equivalent: cradle robber, lechers, pervert! Maybe cougar doesn’t sound so bad actually.

To be honest, whilst I get the allure of others that say with an air of mystery, “wow, you went younger good for you!” – like I won first prize in some sweepstakes - I can’t help but think, seriously, is it that big of a deal? It certainly has not been for centuries upon centuries when we’re speaking of men and their choices. Men seem to get to a certain age when the grim reaper is in smelling distance, and suddenly take leave of all their senses. “So, she’s 22, and thinks Europe is a city in Africa, but she’s a really sweet girl.” Most of their targets don’t even get the moniker of ‘woman.’ And it does not seem to matter if these chosen ones can add (I’m talking basic math here), relate, or contribute in any way. She looks the part and that’s good enough.

On the contrary, I’m proud to say I chose my partner with some sort of intellectual deduction in place (fine, he is also dead HOT. But chemistry is very important). We have a lot in common, he’s mature (for a man anyway), well adjusted, and we both decided that if we had similar life goals, who cares about age. Now, don’t get me wrong, there is such a thing as too young – [ahem, Madonna. Seriously. All that does is make you like you have a hot Brazilian home nurse, and who the hell wants that]. If your prospective partner is still wanting to go to clubs with foam, drinks beer like it’s a race to the finish, and vomits more than three times a year (and not due to illness or food poisoning), you’ve got a problem. 

Then again, there are plenty of women out there that are simply trying a younger model on for size and taking it for a spin. And I say HELL yes to that; if it’s just a question of wanting to take a dip in the pool of youth - I'm telling you, it can be better than night cream - then I’m all for it. As we all know, men do it ALL the time. And women are aging better, looking better, and might as well flaunt their sexual power with pride – [the post 40’s have been hiding in demure baggy matron clothing and ‘no I really shouldn't’ attitudes for far too long]. Plus, according to the whole sexual peak argument, women in their 30’s should be trolling for younger men purely to align their peaks. That's just pragmatic. And of course men die younger (you do; look it up). So I may be a sack of wrinkles in a wheelchair one day, but I’ll be able to wheel up to my partner’s funeral in style without lifting a limb...See, we’re always thinking.

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